How can you possibly be as thin as this? My dear friend, you should never come to the swimming pool without wearing long cotton pants. - And you, my friend, don't ever show yourself to the world in this costume without having upholstered yourself before.... I can give you the address of my upholsterer.

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Image Not Available for How can you possibly be as thin as this? My dear friend, you should never come to the swimming pool without wearing long cotton pants. - And you, my friend, don't ever show yourself to the world in this costume without having upholstered yourself before.... I can give you the address of my upholsterer.
How can you possibly be as thin as this? My dear friend, you should never come to the swimming pool without wearing long cotton pants. - And you, my friend, don't ever show yourself to the world in this costume without having upholstered yourself before.... I can give you the address of my upholsterer.
Image Not Available for How can you possibly be as thin as this? My dear friend, you should never come to the swimming pool without wearing long cotton pants. - And you, my friend, don't ever show yourself to the world in this costume without having upholstered yourself before.... I can give you the address of my upholsterer.

How can you possibly be as thin as this? My dear friend, you should never come to the swimming pool without wearing long cotton pants. - And you, my friend, don't ever show yourself to the world in this costume without having upholstered yourself before.... I can give you the address of my upholsterer.

PortfolioPlate 1 from series "Paris dans l'eau"
Date1864
MediumLithograph
DimensionsSheet: 142 × 245 mm. (5 9/16 × 9 5/8 in.)
Credit LineNelson and Juanita Greif Gutman Collection
Object number1963.313.25
NOT ON VIEW
Last Updated1/11/24
Image Not Available for The Comedians from the Province. - Can you imagine, my dear, these barbarians were hissing during my performance in "Cinna"; and you have seen me in "Cinna". - Yes, I flatter myself having seen you, but you must understand that these provincials are utter simpletons. Once you have your debut at the Theatre Français, you'll be seeing Mr. J.J. who will pamper you, you'll be asking 100'000 francs annual salary, and they'll applaud you... how can you possibly succeed with 1'500 francs at the Beauvais... you fool!
The Comedians from the Province. - Can you imagine, my dear, these barbarians were hissing during my performance in "Cinna"; and you have seen me in "Cinna". - Yes, I flatter myself having seen you, but you must understand that these provincials are utter simpletons. Once you have your debut at the Theatre Français, you'll be seeing Mr. J.J. who will pamper you, you'll be asking 100'000 francs annual salary, and they'll applaud you... how can you possibly succeed with 1'500 francs at the Beauvais... you fool!
1842
Image Not Available for My dear friend, we have learned yesterday at the theatre that a gentleman has inadvertedly stepped on your foot.... We have come to get his address and we are eager to announce that the affair is arranged.... He is waiting for you this morning in the Bois de Boulogne. You will raise pistols at a distance of 15 paces.
My dear friend, we have learned yesterday at the theatre that a gentleman has inadvertedly stepped on your foot.... We have come to get his address and we are eager to announce that the affair is arranged.... He is waiting for you this morning in the Bois de Boulogne. You will raise pistols at a distance of 15 paces.
1845
Image Not Available for Exploiting friendship. My dear Alphonse, I've invited these gentlemen, my friends, to dine at your home. I would like them to taste our champagne, we'll laugh... wait a minute! I've an idea. What if we went to the wood? We could take your barouche and you could lend us some clothes as we only came to pay a simple visite... In the meantime, why don't you give us some cards and some Napoleons to pass the time. Eh? My good Alphonse, dear chap. How about it?
Exploiting friendship. My dear Alphonse, I've invited these gentlemen, my friends, to dine at your home. I would like them to taste our champagne, we'll laugh... wait a minute! I've an idea. What if we went to the wood? We could take your barouche and you could lend us some clothes as we only came to pay a simple visite... In the meantime, why don't you give us some cards and some Napoleons to pass the time. Eh? My good Alphonse, dear chap. How about it?
1837
Image Not Available for A new way to float down the river of life. - Radiguet you rascal, to hell with you, your boat and your new invention.... it is your fault that the entire outing went down the drain. - Come, come now.... no reason to scream hell. I am just angry about my boot-maker... since my shoes are being filled with water coming from the holes in the pockets of my pants.
A new way to float down the river of life. - Radiguet you rascal, to hell with you, your boat and your new invention.... it is your fault that the entire outing went down the drain. - Come, come now.... no reason to scream hell. I am just angry about my boot-maker... since my shoes are being filled with water coming from the holes in the pockets of my pants.
1843
Image Not Available for Robert Macaire bookseller. Ladies and gentlemen, would there be anyone in this pleasant place who'd like to make himself a nice little income, without difficulty and without working?... If there is someone he should stock my primers... You don't have to be a bookseller to be a specialist in this trade, you don't even have to know how to read, quite the contrary!... You only have to pay me a deposit... The bigger the better, as the saying goes.
Robert Macaire bookseller. Ladies and gentlemen, would there be anyone in this pleasant place who'd like to make himself a nice little income, without difficulty and without working?... If there is someone he should stock my primers... You don't have to be a bookseller to be a specialist in this trade, you don't even have to know how to read, quite the contrary!... You only have to pay me a deposit... The bigger the better, as the saying goes.
1836
Image Not Available for Robert Macaire, salesman in Bibles. - (Bertrand): The subscribers claim that we are swindlers, thieves... I mean purloiners, and they are kicking... er, I mean, turning us out. - (Robert): What expressions to use, you rascal... you must address me more decently or I kick... er, I mean push you out of the door. It's you highfaluting manner, your high pitched twaddle, that riles the subscribers. Stop that! If they throw you out of the door, go back through the rear window... if they slap your face, turn your other cheek... but don't you come back here without subscriptions, or I ... well, never mind!
Robert Macaire, salesman in Bibles. - (Bertrand): The subscribers claim that we are swindlers, thieves... I mean purloiners, and they are kicking... er, I mean, turning us out. - (Robert): What expressions to use, you rascal... you must address me more decently or I kick... er, I mean push you out of the door. It's you highfaluting manner, your high pitched twaddle, that riles the subscribers. Stop that! If they throw you out of the door, go back through the rear window... if they slap your face, turn your other cheek... but don't you come back here without subscriptions, or I ... well, never mind!
1838
Image Not Available for Monsieur Cabassol, how can you possibly take up arms after having assisted in three sessions of the Peace Congress. - Precisely, I mount my guard in order to avoid being at war with my sergeant-major.
Monsieur Cabassol, how can you possibly take up arms after having assisted in three sessions of the Peace Congress. - Precisely, I mount my guard in order to avoid being at war with my sergeant-major.
1849
Image Not Available for My dear Baroness, I must congratulate you, your dive was superb, such a dive can only come from you!
My dear Baroness, I must congratulate you, your dive was superb, such a dive can only come from you!
1847
Image Not Available for My dear friend, you really don't look very well this morning. I am not speaking to you as a doctor, but as a friend. I must insist in treating you.... better than I would treat myself. I am going to apply 30 leeches to your belly and if by tomorrow you have not improved, I'll apply another sixty.
My dear friend, you really don't look very well this morning. I am not speaking to you as a doctor, but as a friend. I must insist in treating you.... better than I would treat myself. I am going to apply 30 leeches to your belly and if by tomorrow you have not improved, I'll apply another sixty.
1845
Image Not Available for Just look where they squeezed in my painting. - I say, my friend... you are not happy?.... you should be more than satisfied since they are hanging higher than those by Meissonnier!
Just look where they squeezed in my painting. - I say, my friend... you are not happy?.... you should be more than satisfied since they are hanging higher than those by Meissonnier!
1859
Image Not Available for The Ladies' Bath. Yes, my dear, it is just the way I have the honour of telling you. I was pregnant with him for eleven months and people thought I was dropsical. Would you believe that this is already six years ago? He takes after his father, drum-major of the 6th legion. Sings the Marseillaise (national anthem) by heart and has a drink in the morning like a real fire-fighter. Oh, my little darling, come here and give your mother a kiss!
The Ladies' Bath. Yes, my dear, it is just the way I have the honour of telling you. I was pregnant with him for eleven months and people thought I was dropsical. Would you believe that this is already six years ago? He takes after his father, drum-major of the 6th legion. Sings the Marseillaise (national anthem) by heart and has a drink in the morning like a real fire-fighter. Oh, my little darling, come here and give your mother a kiss!
1841
Image Not Available for Come on you scoundrel, come on! - Just you wait, you crook! - Oh come on Alfred, after all you know each other already for some twenty years! When you are friends, it's different than when you are not friends.
Come on you scoundrel, come on! - Just you wait, you crook! - Oh come on Alfred, after all you know each other already for some twenty years! When you are friends, it's different than when you are not friends.
1874